Man, I Love the Internet (Part 2 in a series)

Creation Science

From the comments ona blog post about Creationists that don’t quite understand what science is but are claiming to use it comes this shining Internet gem:

May 2nd, 2007 at 9:14 am


Man, I love the Internet (part 1 in a series)


I love the Internet. I really do. It’s full of creative things that people have made, it’s given me some really amazing real life relationships, and it’s changed the way we all think about information and knowledge.

But none of that is in evidence below. The following is a complete response to a post about Google Voice at

..Monument Of Religion And Party Council..And Center Of Business And Hobby Activities Environment..
..That remind me about the people making the promise and doing the remembrance places..And the lots of a lots of stuffs coming out of from their competitions innovations 2009,they will get the oscars prize if they in the movies business..Ha..Ha..Ha..I’m bad, I’m bad..Ha Ha..Ha..
..Let sing the goggle in the another place was party songs of famous guy..We all be working very careful with new launch and it can be in wrong direction if we not care..Mix-up will be bad..Ha..Ha..Ha..
Posted by: ..Monument Of Religion And Party Council..And Center Of Business And Hobby Activities Environment.. | Mar 12, 2009 5:48:14 PM

Is it not the very perfection of an Internet post?

a eulogy

Look at the size of his fat head!

Jerry Falwell
a eulogy

Jerry Falwell was a big man. Not big of heart, not big of mind, but a big man anyway. His corpulence could only be compared in volume to that of his homophobia, contempt of women, and capacity to ignore the core tenets of the faith he claimed to hold dear. His love of prostitutes, politics, and money put him in line with the great corruptors of society while his media outlet and university gave him access to the greatest number of hungry minds and souls. Truly, he can be considered one of the worst individuals in American society through the 20th century. If he was right, and fortunately, he wasn’t, he is now sharing Hell with J. Edgar Hoover, Alan Dulles, Joseph McCarthy, and Richard Nixon in a special place for those whose thirst for power makes them consume all around them, body, soul, and leftovers.

(Jerry Falwell’s Hit Parade, by Slate.)

it’s ALWAYS the computer addressing you.

An Epic for Our Time

Here. Try this. Do a Google search for “ifuckgod”. Here. I’ll do it for you.

What you’ve got there is a guy who, far from having one giant HTML page, is really leveraging Web2.0 to synergize his strengths.

I’m not going to bother wishing that he’d come here and paste his magnum opus into the comments here on L-Dopa, so I’ll paste them down here myself.

It’s… it’s so beautiful. It even ends in mid-sentence. It’s an absolutely flawless work, rivaling that of the great Jon Land himself.

(Thanks to frequent L-Dopa contributor Cauley for finding this.)
Continue reading “it’s ALWAYS the computer addressing you.”

roll vs. SAN


As some loyal L-Dopa readers have surmised, I’m a game designer. As such, I keep an eye out on what others are doing with the medium. For several years now “Matthew/C++” has been writing what he calls the HYBRID RPG. But to call in a “role-playing game” is to grossly underestimate the scale of the endeavor. What Matthew/C++ is working on is a System of the World in the philosophical sense. And he is doing it with some of the language of 80s role-playing games.

Below, find one of my favorite sentences.

In Champions/Hero rpg, END (0, ½) USUALLY APPLIES TO MUTANTS AND means that person starts @ 0, which is NOT a value of 0, but meaning default, THEN if the character is a mutant, but he must be a mutant in order for him to have the or/and be @ ½, which is what his mutant power level will by @ after his IQ is reduced after his IQ is increased by +1 advantage, meaning his C2 will double or increase by factor of 2x, which is then reduced to ½ advantage or ½ limitation from his 2nd 0 END, which is his NEW PL after having his PL increased due to his LS or Life Span decreased, such for a character such as the MU Spiderman, allowing him to increase his PL or Power Level @ C2 by factor of 2x with advantage of +1, which @ C2 for IQ is increased to which must be decreased to have mutant power(s), the more he decreases his IQ, the more power(s) he gets, and NOTE that he already starts with a larger LS or Life Span than an average adult male human, allowing him to decrease his LS to human levels, which in turn will increase his PL, and since his PL is, also, greater than average adult male human, his PL will increase even more, with his LS decreased: this all can be reversed to apply for PL (rather than LS) @ C2 of ½ its original value @ -1 limitation, which will increase LS by a factor of 2x which is +1 advantage, to increase LS @ C2 by factor of 2 by advantage of +1, which is NOT usually done, since mutants usually crave power(s) rather than longevity or/and longer life span: this is NOT the rule itself, but a little background information on what I’m about to say after my next comment, which will also serve as a little extra background information on what I’ll say later, in a brief moment, after this brief commentary to serve as a little background information on what I’ll say later so that it’s NOT taken out of context.

What I find most fascinating about this is how totally earnest it is. He’s trying to model the universe (one, significantly, without women*) using the language of computer science and, I think, physics. It is a view unhindered by communication, so we can’t understand it (I presume). It is a glimpse into someone else’s mind, their symbolic system. We all have these but we translate it into symbols that we share so that we can simplify enough to share. Matthew/C++ has no such concern with HYBRID. This is his symbolic system, compromised only insofar as that it uses letters, words, and numbers that we know.

* “… {(0,0) END} is a human, usually a male human, at least in this rpg HYBRID, since women are too complicated to make in my rpg, since creating women in my rpg requires politically incorrect math …”

die musik der bereiche

Ein Alptraum

The Conet Project is a really creepy collection of number stations, which they’ll be happy to explain to you and I posted about a couple weeks back. I was sufficiently charmed by their sinister strangeness — enhanced by the use of music boxes and toy pianos — that I made a piece of music to go with one of them, Swedish Rhapsody. Give it a listen. It’s part of a larger music project I’m doing in my noisy basement studio. Some of it’s noise, some of it’s trancy music.

Here’s the first track good enough to show around the neighborhood, Mädchen, Endut.

(This was crossposted to Monkey Do, Monkey See)

this is not funny.

Constitution, revised

When I was in school, there were two things that I was told made America the best country in the world: we’d never waged a war on anyone aggressively (which was already easily debatable at the time, but still actually debatable and not a transparent lie) and you couldn’t be imprisoned without the due process of arrest, accusation, speedy trial, and conviction.

We were told that this is because the Constitution of the United States is a flexible but inviolable document subject to representative review and judicial interpretation that stemmed from that due process.

So, let’s take count:

  • Unjust, unprovoked, and morally bankrupt war? You betcha.
  • Lack of due process? Holy shit.

So, this is designed to get terrorists, right? And does it define what a terrorist is, and how we can make sure that we’ve got one when we do?

Well, we’re not allowed to know.

(posted also to Monkey Do, Monkey See.)

ooops. . .

So a few months ago during a leisurely hike, a friend of mine and Lou’s (my best friend and ex-boyfriend) suggested we put together a comedy fire routine, possibly for the upcoming Xara festival (for which we were already performing with our fire conclave, The Phoenix Projekt). This was very exciting to us, because no one EVER does fire comedy. . . fire performers are generally too busy accumulating all the trappings of would-be rock stars to think outside the Tribal/Sexy/Intense box.

Cut to one month later, and this is what we made (that’s me on the left, with the red dreads, and lou is the bald man on the left). . .featuring the Tubatron stylings of our very own David Silverman, who explains how to make a Tubatron here.

sometimes they forget to be subtle.


Sometimes, the Right forgets to be subtle. They forget that Hispanics are a growing part of their constituency (and speaking of which, what kind of self-hate is that?). When that happens, they find themselves saying things like this: Whites have to have more babies in order to keep the Hispanics from becoming a politically powerful group.

Now, I realize that calling someone a Nazi is an Internet cliché, but this is so incredibly in line with Nazi eugenics (particularly when coupled with the “Minutemen” — which, as a Massachussetan, it really bothers me that they used that name) that the similarity has to be pointed out.

Come on, America. How could you have not seen this coming? I say “you” because this is the kind of shit I’ve been talking about for almost a decade now. So let me say this straight:

If the Religious Right continues its rise to power, they will kill you. They are murderous, greedy, lying, stealing tyrants. If you voted for Bush, it’s your fault. If you voted for a Republican for the House or Senate, it’s your fault.

But you’re a grownup living in a democracy. You can change that. You can look around at your fellow Americans and decide to fire the guy who’s making this happen, who abused your trust by promising “compassion”.

The Republicans may have, at some point, had a valid political point: a balanced budget, for instance, is a good idea, keeping us out of debt to those who don’t have our country’s best interests at heart. Self-reliance, that’s a good thing, right? But this thing, this machine that it’s become? It speaks only lies: it indebts you and your children to the house of Saud and it removes your civil rights, the very things you need to make decisions of conscience as an individual.

They want nothing less than world-dominating power. And, for some reason, Americans have been voting to give it to them.

this just in: whackjob conspiracy theorist right wing nut gets own podcast

right wing crackpot

Doesn’t anyone realize that he deliberately sounds like a snake-oil salesman? That he calls his right-wing crackpot show “the greatest show on radio”… clearly referring to P.T. “Sucker Born Every Minute” Barnum?

Anyway, good for fucking him, he finally got around to making a podcast so now people can pay to have him make shit up and make believe he’s got a right to be angry, the drug-addled, entitlement-demanding criminal (at least by his own reckoning) that he is.

Anyway, the reason I posted this is because of his mode of speech:

Well, that didn’t stop us. That didn’t stop us, ladies and gentlemen. No siree, Bob. We have been working with the powers that be at Apple, and we have reached via technological advancement and software the point to where Monday, and I just tested this. We’ve been feverishly working on it; I just tested it, and it is flawless and it is so easy that if you are not a member you’re going to become one and just be able to access the podcasts this way.

Look how many words he uses to say “I have a podcast!”

Well, OK, that’s not how many words he used. He used 870 words to say it. Is this what his listeners need? The right-wing crackpots that listen to Rush Limbaugh need the painfully, un-newsworthy spelled out with lots of “Nosiree!”s in there to make sure he sounds like One Of Us?

This folksy, “I’m just one o’ you folks” trick is really wearing thin. The Yale Bushes with their “Texas” twangs, their repetition, their “you kin trust me”isms — why aren’t the people of Texas and folksy places everywhere (like, say, Western Massachusetts) deeply offended at their pretension?

OK, yes, Massachusetts voted for Kerry last time around. But a lot of people here voted for the right-wing crackpot we now have in office, too. Why don’t they feel like they’re being talked down to by this horseshit?

Anyway, if anyone would like to join me in a Googlebomb of “Right wing crackpot“ing Mr. Limbaugh and Dubya, I invite you to join me.

guitarist wanted: must not be clammy handed

David Icke only wears turquoise

David Icke is a former soccer player who keeps churning out poorly written, even-more-poorly supported, conspiracy theory that’s like Cheese Whiz™ for your soul. David Icke posits such political figures as Al Gore as blood slurping satanists, and claims the reptilian humanoids (yes! lizard people!) who are running this whole planet (again, yes! lizard people!) can be recognized by their clammy hands. David Icke doesn’t believe in margins or proper punctuation, nor does he rely too heavily on anything even remotely approaching logic. David Icke thinks whole civilizations are thriving in the center of the earth, and controlling our every facet of existence.

David Icke has a son.

And David Icke’s son has a rock band.