guitarist wanted: must not be clammy handed

March 8th, 2006

David Icke only wears turquoise

David Icke is a former soccer player who keeps churning out poorly written, even-more-poorly supported, conspiracy theory that’s like Cheese Whiz™ for your soul. David Icke posits such political figures as Al Gore as blood slurping satanists, and claims the reptilian humanoids (yes! lizard people!) who are running this whole planet (again, yes! lizard people!) can be recognized by their clammy hands. David Icke doesn’t believe in margins or proper punctuation, nor does he rely too heavily on anything even remotely approaching logic. David Icke thinks whole civilizations are thriving in the center of the earth, and controlling our every facet of existence.

David Icke has a son.

And David Icke’s son has a rock band.

~S



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  • jimmy

    Sure, David Icke is the severely retarded, alcoholic, one-eyed, club-footed, raving mad uncle that every would-be “legitimate” conspiracy theorist has chained in their basement,.. their albatross, hung about their necks, pulling them deeper and deeper into the briny void of public incredulity and so far away from any semblance of respectability, but let’s not be too quick to poo-poo his rather lucid assumption that anybody who would be in line for the American presidency is a blood slurping Satanist. I think I could lend that one some credence.

  • http://www.tao-games.com/ Ben Lehman

    David Icke is the world’s most immersed LARPer.