How Kitten Spaghetti Is Like Las Vegas

July 14th, 2005

Here’s something funny that I’ve noticed: the presence of slot machines makes any place depressing. I visited Monaco as a kid with my family (we have friends who live there) and the city of Monte Carlo is, as you’d imagine, immaculate. It’s really like a James Bond movie. Tile sidewalks, gold leaf on 18th century buildings, stuff like that. But anywhere you’d see a video game normally, there were slot machines.

As two of the L-Dopans have noted, gambling, for me, is like watching a kitten get its organs removed, replaced with spaghetti, then watching it return for more. Monaco was where I first got that feeling.

The good food, laughably snotty “French” (they’re not even real Frenchmen. I don’t know what they’re so snotty about.), beautiful architecture, fascinating history, and stunning views were all tainted by the desperation evident in every corner of the city.

I imagine Las Vegas to be like Monte Carlo, only without the good food, laughably snotty “French”, beautiful architecture, fascinating history, and stunning views.

3 Responses to “How Kitten Spaghetti Is Like Las Vegas”

  1. Jeff says:

    Kitten Spaghetti was always my favorite Bond girl.

  2. Sarah says:

    yes, you are correct, sir. vegas is indeed like monte carlo without all that annoying “appeal” or “culture”, which has instead been replaced with: Honkys in Cowboy Hats Lookin’ For A Fight, Tired Old Whores, Drunks With Mullets Lookin’ For A Fight, Overpriced ShoppingMall Casinos, Haggard Strippers, Fat Lumpy Tourists, and Angry Mexicans With Mullets in Cowboy Hats Lookin’ For A Fight.

  3. Joshua says:

    I get enough of those here in Connecticut.